Friendship is certainly the finest balm
for the pangs of disappointed love.
I’ve been struggling to finish this post for a few days now. Last Friday, my PC went to the pasture, so we ordered a new one, but it’s not a high-end computer. It came with everything I needed, except good graphics. Intel HD Graphics 2000 sucks rocks….and then some. I don’t know why anyone would put it on computers today. It’s not even supported by Intel anymore. I don’t know what they were thinking when they began integrating graphics into the motherboard, but it barely runs a browser. Don’t even think about running a graphic intense program for very long. I’ve spent a lot of time frozen and unable to do much, but I have ordered a new GPU card so that will be fixed soon.
On another note, when you have no computer, you do a lot of reading. I was surfing on my Kindle the other day and found this article about the many different friendships that you can find in Jane Austen’s books. If you have not noticed already, I am a huge Jane Austen fan. I love all of her books (Have all but one book, I think) and have watched all of the adaptations. Her books are full of wisdom that was far beyond her times. My favorite is Pride and Prejudice, but it is closely followed by Emma. Emma covered a lot about friendships. She talked about what genuine friends versus fake friends are. There are the user types, the two-faced types, the keep your enemies’ close types, the real friend with bad advice types, the one who should “know better” types, and the improver types. To me, the worst is the improver types.
There is a character in Emma who is considered the “improver” friend. In the beginning, Emma was encouraging Mr. Philip Elton to court Harriet, but he wanted Emma. He mistook her attentions as encouragement and thought that she knew of his intentions. She did not. In the end, he married Augusta Elton, a loud, pretentious woman who had more opinions and voiced them than she did intelligence.
An improver friend like Mrs. Elton thinks that they know everything and all they know is nothing. Improver friends don’t listen to what you tell them since they assume they know already. They pretend that they care about you, but they don’t really. They will tell you what you need until you cave-in mixed in with passive-aggressive statements and what seems like “genuine” care of your feelings. This is the worst fake friend that exists, in my opinion. They don’t care about you, your opinion, or what you feel. They will push until you conform to their ideal of what is best for you. Or they drop you.
One of the worst things to do with me is to pretend you care while pushing your opinion of what I “need to do” on me. Don’t tell me what I need. I’ll figure out what I need and tell you. Don’t assume you know what’s best for me. I’m 45 years old. I’ve been through a world of hurt and have a hard past, but I still need to make my own decisions on what I need, not what someone thinks I need. The saying “assumptions make an ass out of you and me” applies here. The more you assume, the more pissed off I become, and the more I fight against it. Assuming you know my needs doesn’t make you a friend. No, that just makes you some asshole with a god-complex and a narcissistic opinion pusher with fake intentions and a whole lot of opinions.
I love Jane Austen. Her books are full of love, life, search for happiness, and some heartbreak. She covers issues that women faced most, and her wisdom was beyond her times. Jane Austen covers a lot of these tropes in her books. In Emma, it was Mrs. Elton. In Pride and Prejudice, it was Miss Bingley. In P&P, Miss Bingley was the nice to your face, kind of friend who only wanted to be friends with someone if she could get something out of it. She was transparent in her condescension and disdain for Elizabeth Bennet. She was willing to use anyone for her gain and didn’t care who she stepped on in the process. Her characters were all rich and had a depth to them that they are popular even today. Her plots were at times cliché, and some of her characters were extreme, but I still love them all. Even the characters who are hated. My favorite is Pride and Prejudice. My second favorite Austen book is Emma.
There are a lot of lessons to learn in Jane Austen’s books, Adventurites. What is your favorite? Share in the comments if you like Jane Austen. Which book is your favorite and why? Until next time. Have a good day, Adventurites! Laters! ~LA
Friendship Lessons Credits:
Head: LeLUTKA Bento Head – Lilly.2.5
Body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3
Skin: Amara Beauty – Kenna fair – BR BROWS
Eyes: Avi-Glam – Striking Eyes – Lelutka Applier – 12 RARE
Hair: TRUTH HAIR – Unravel
Glasses: DAZED – Niji Glasses
Top: MOoH! Violet top bold
50% discount which is just 99L. Feb 19 – March 4 in the main store
Shorts: Tres Blah – Marlow Denim Shorts (Maitreya) – Dark